Today, I fell into a pretty scary hole. I started going through a folder of some of my old writing. I was having a serious cringe attack. I’m talking like a full blown I can’t believe I actually did that cringe attack.
I do this quite a lot when I look at my old work, whether it’s writing or a video that I made, or design work.
It was good work at the time. But now… Not so much.
It’s just that I’ve grown so much in whatever area that the thing I created no longer seems good to me at all.
Oddly enough, these occurrences make me want to hide in a hole and never create anything again.
But that’s the opposite of what I should be doing. The reality is that the reason I’m having those cringe attacks is because I’m improving. I can see the flaws in my work that I couldn’t see at the time.
A lot of that old writing was stuff I was pretty proud of because I was pushing myself outside of my creative comfort zone and trying new things.
That symbolizes something bigger to me. Growth is sometimes uncomfortable.
I tend to shy away from things that are uncomfortable (like most humans). But I’ve also learned that that’s not the way to get better. I’ve also learned that if it makes me uncomfortable but will help me in the long run, I need to just do it. I can’t overthink it.
To grow, I just have to jump into doing something. Then, when looking back years later, I will realize how much I’ve grown – even if causes a few cringe attacks.